How Hard Can This Be?

A big, dry California welcome to my blog! Here you’ll get a nibble, a good sized bite, and sometimes even a whole serving of the things that keep me up at night – my passions. Some are whimsical, some are laugh out loud funny, some are edible, and some are downright brain-pinchers (those keep me up ALL night). But a few of them are more on the heartfelt side and mean a lot to me. Maybe they will mean something to you, too. That would be really cool. Being able to have a blog to share them with you is going to be fun, even though I know it’ll be hard work. But I’m up for it. I hope you’ll keep me company. Grab a cup of your favorite and come sit a spell. You are in for a ride, because you see, I’m on a mission from God.

The Lord has gifted me with the ability to write and I’ve been writing for years, but mainly for myself because I thought I knew better than He did about what kind of writing I should be doing. Pffft! And in my young and ignorant ways, I don’t remember ever asking him. Hmmm. Problem? I think probably so. Sending out the occasional submission and receiving the decisive rejection letter has never been easy to swallow, or to see it as encouragement to continue. So I would take a correspondence writing course or a creative writing class to soothe my ego and get fired up about where I was headed next. But, of course, it was without the Lord’s direction and would end in epic fail. On a positive note, I was the editor and a reporter of a magazine for a tri-state church district, I wrote copy for a couple of church newsletters, and also wrote content while managing some websites for a few clients, so I wasn’t always walking in shame. Just sayin.

As this pattern continued, I kept wondering whenever I was moved to write that book proposal or submit that magazine query, “How hard can this be?” with the blinded naivete of the hopeful lottery participant. (I wonder Who was “moving” me to do that writing, hm?) But then, “What could I possibly be doing wrong,” I would wonder when I would get those danged rejection letters or emails back. Who likes rejection, right? So what did I do? What most thin-skinned, wet behind the ears beginner usually did. I quit. Submitting my work, that is. But I couldn’t stop writing. If you are a writer, you know what I’m talkin about. I kept writing, filling up those journals and files on the hard drive, but I virtually gave up all hope of writing anything of significance.

Fast forward several years. God enters in a big way. My husband and I recently started to attend a vibrant community church where I am getting pretty involved. Not too long ago, I was asked to write a grant to acquire hiking gear for low-income kids. I think that was God’s way of stirring up the juices again because once I got started on that grant, an awakening in me occurred. We got the grant, and right after that a dear friend of mine hit the nail on the head during a conversation when she inadvertently admonished me to get my priorities straight. BAM!

Then, the Lord told me he wanted me to write a blog. This time it was a direct command. I messed around with the blog for a bit, but other responsibilities I was involved in got me sidetracked and I dropped the ball. Not long after that, He brought me squarely about and told me that I had given up on His command. You know, the one to write for Him. I was soundly convicted. I felt sick to my stomach with shame and spent much time in prayer asking for forgiveness and asked what exactly He wanted me to write. I realized that unfinished business with God is flat out disobedience.

But our God is good! As a result of my confession and desire to do it HIS way, the Lord very clearly told me to get back to that blog again, and to become a part of the writing community of COMPEL, directed by Lisa TerKeurst. I was so excited to be truly doing the Lord’s will and it was having a direct reaction to my writing life! Well, I’ve done both and couldn’t be more thrilled! The mistake I’d made before was that I had not asked Him the area where He specifically wanted me to write. I had just trotted along on my own, thinking I had known best. I had only needed to ask! And THEN be obedient to Him, of course.

Being thwacked upside the head a few times by God is probably not the most desirable way to start writing for the right reasons, but if I ask “How hard can it be?” and know that He is with me every step of the way because I am allowing Him to do the leading this time, I’m all in. The answer to the question is, “It’s hard as heck!” but it will be a whole lot less bumpy doin it HIS way than MY way, let me tell ya! So, Friend, once again, I welcome you to my blog! I do hope you enjoy. And I hope you haven’t over-indulged this first time out! I want you to come back for seconds and thirds and more!

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